NINE WORDS WOMEN USE

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are
right and you need to shut up.


(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an
hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given
five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.


(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something,
and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing
usually end in fine.


(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!


(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement
often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an
idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and
arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of
nothing.)


(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman
can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard
before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.


(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just
say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true,
unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not
thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome'. That will bring on a
'whatever').


(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F-- YOU!


(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement,
meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several
times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man
asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3.